Those we fail today, we continue to fail time and time again!
In the course of my work it never ceases to amaze me how we as society have and continue to fail others! We don’t seem to see it or are we choosing not to? On the outside we portray a society that cares, a society that accepts everyone ~ yet I see a different side of the coin!
Let me tell you about Dylan (named changed).
Some time ago I went to the jobcentre with someone I was supporting. On arrival I was aware of Dylan, he was shouting asking for help to fill in a form. Time and time again Dylan went to the desk to ask or help in completing a form so he could apply for money. Time and time again he was told that no-one could help him. Staff told him to go and call the advice line. Dylan tried to explain (in his own unique way) that he’d spent the two hours a day for the past two days on the phone getting nowhere! He wasn’t believed and the Jobcentre staff asked him to leave, the security guard was at the ready too!
What they saw was an angry young man, a nuisance, someone they could do without!
What I saw was someone desperate for help, someone trying to get their message across ~ should I offer my help was a question I didn’t have to answer, I knew already I would! I made a ‘deal’ that once I’d finished what I came to do, I’d sit down and help him with the form. The smile on Dylan’s face and the look of gratefulness in his eyes said everything.
He kept to his word and so did I!
Whilst filling in the form I realised that this wasn’t just a form filling situation, it was about much more.
Dylan was someone who’d been failed his whole life! His learning disability had failed to be recognised at school, except it had been but he had no clear diagnosis (label) and without this he and his family had failed to get the support they needed. Did Dylan’s disability go undiagnosed because of lack of money or was it he was deemed not worth investing in? I realised this was a young man who’s gone through the system failing at every step, thinking it was him when all the time it wasn’t! What cut through me was when Dylan said that dying seemed his best option! I tell you how I didn’t cry there and then! I knew that I had to do everything in my power to change this even if it meant more work, Dylan was far too important!
I stopped the form filling and arranged for him to come and see me as he didn’t have any money himself (because he hadn’t been paid benefits, because he couldn’t fill in the form), I gave him the money from my own pocket.
Since that first meeting I’ve got to know Dylan and what a great young man he is! He has a strong work ethic, he really wants to do something and be somebody. His issues have gone far beyond form filling or his undiagnosed disability, there’s debt, a feeling of worthlessness, the list seemed endless ~ if I felt this was it any wonder he felt as he did?
Overtime we’re putting his life puzzle together, it’s going to take a while and we’re both in it for the long haul but working together, we’ll make the changes we need to ensure that Dylan’s future is much brighter than his past.
At our last meeting Dylan and I cried tears of sorrow and laughter and he told me that he now feels lucky he met me that day because his life is changing, he doesn’t feel alone anymore! He said he now wants to live! That for me means everything and says it all! It’s exactly the reason why I do what I do everyday!
Things could have turned differently that day had Dylan and I not met. It’s likely he’d have been removed from the jobcentre, arrested, his form would have remained uncompleted, he’d have no money and would have continued in the spiral of being failed! Thankfully, we did meet and HEALS is able to help him and failure is now part of Dylan’s past.
Our next huge challenge is to try and get a diagnosis. Unfortunately, because Dylan is an adult, some of the tests he could have had done on the NHS or by experts as a child (under 16)are no longer available and cost. I’ve managed to persuade two of the top UK Specialists to see Dylan for £1,350 instead of their usual £3,000 fee. Of course they’ll be accommodation and travel on cost bringing it to just under £2,000.
He shouldn’t have to pay! I can hear you say. You’re right he shouldn’t but he does because Dylan has been failed and I for one have no intention of failing him anymore. How and where to find the money is my challenge but I face it with passion and determination!
Dylan has so to offer and I plan to give him his dream of being someone and he’s going to help and inspire others and show them that where you start out in life doesn’t determine where we end our journey! And he’ll show them that disability is no obstacle!
Dylan is just one example, I’m helping more like him everyday, all needing assessments costing between £350 and £1,500 each and everyone just as deserving.
Those we fail today, we continue to fail time and time again ~ except on my watch!
If you would like to help please donate via: http://localgiving.com/charity/healsmalmesbury
Name has been changed to protect identity.
http://www.alisoncross-jones.com
alisoncrossjones 