“The only disability in life is a bad attitude” ~ Scott Hamilton
This is true! It amazes me that we legislate against discrimination against those with a disability and things such as malicious communications. We live in an age where our children are educated about equality and diversity and even study citizenship. We’re considered to be an inclusive society or at least that’s what we like to think. The notion of community and caring is something we understand. How wrong can we be?
Over the years I’ve come across people who’ve said that at school their child had a diagnosis of a hidden disability but they’ve outgrown it! Can you believe that some people actually think that hidden disabilities suddenly disappear in adulthood! If you are born with a hidden disability then you’ll always have that disability ~ how it affects the person might change and the challenges in life will be different but it’s still there ~ no miracle cure exists.
Parenting a child with their own challenges is a whole new ball game ~ the rule book is totally different. I know when my own daughter was small how frustrated I’d become because I struggled to come to terms with the fact she was different. Then I started to think what it must be like for her, how can she be dealing with life. Susan Hampshire says “it is a lonely existance to be a child with a disability which no-one can see or understand, you exasperate your teachers, you disappoint your parents and worst of all you know you are not stupid.” This says it how it is, I made the choice that my daughter would not disappoint me because I would always do my best to try and see things from her perspective ~ although life will always hold challenges for both of us we’ve succeeded. In helping her, we can use our experience to help and give hope to others.
Many adults with hidden disabilities go on to have children of their own who face their own challenges because they too have a hidden disability. How much harder is it for these parents to navigate life? It’s a bit like having a bicycle kit to fix a car ~ no matter what you do it’ll never be enough. Is any of it the parents fault, whether they have a disability or not? Of course it isn’t!
Why is it that there are those who take delight in bullying those who are vulnerable? Those who make vulnerable people with a learning disability think that they are friends and then coerce them into behaving in a certain way?
NEWSFLASH! People with hidden disbilities cery often are unable to read the signs, they have difficulty distinguishing, banter, jokes, sarcasm, etc because they take life at face value.
Shame on those who know these individuals are vulnerable and still persist in making them think that they are their friends so that they’ll behave in an inapproriate way or do something wrong. What makes it worse is that these same individuals will then take pleasure in publicly humiliating the vulnerable because they have behaved and done exactly what those coercing them had wanted.
I’ve witnessed such behaviour over social media and I’ve also seen the posts by those vulnerable individuals. Maybe those doing the humiliating should think about them, just once! All they want to do is fit in, have friends, be like everyone else ~ don’t we all want that? It’s because they want to fit in that makes them an easy target!
“Disability is a matter of perception. If you can do just one thing well, you’re needed by someone” ~ Martina Navratilova. This is exactly one of the reasons why Heals – Help Empowerment And Local Support was set up. We help those who are vulnerable to have a voice, to find the things they are good at and encourage them, so that they can feel part of the community and avoid leading an isolated life.
What would I say to those being negative to those with hidden disabilities? I’d say start looking at the person in the mirror and ask them to change their ways because no message could be any clearer. Take a look at yourself and make a change ~ the world will be a better place and you’ll be a better person too because “the only disability in life is a bad attitude” ~ Scott Hamilton.
http://www.healsmalmesbury.com
alisoncrossjones 