“There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life less than one you are capable of.” ~ Nelson Mandela

“There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life less than one you are capable of.” ~ Nelson Mandela

As young children we look at world from a perspective we seem to lose as we grow older. We have big dreams about what’s possible. As we grow older there are times when our early ambition gets side tracked and we go off course. I know as a child my dream was to be a singer or an actress. I’d watch the old balack and white films with my Nan and Grampy and I imagined being a star! Through the years that dream changed, I realised that since I didn’t live in Hollywood or wasn’t likely to go there, it wasn’t possible. My dream changed to be the best at what I was good at! What that was I had no idea!

Like so many people everyday life combined with a lack of confidence meant that life drifted. I had jobs of every kind, I became a mother, I moved around, I was just went through the motions and settling. No matter what I did two things started to become apparent. I was good at thinking outside the box and helping people and I could help others learn. How could these two skills possibly lead anywhere?

Sixteen years ago my life changed completely, I was forced to start over and I dreaded it! I’ve now come to see it for the blessing it was. I didn’t have a clue where I was going but I did realise it was important was to get back on the path and decide which direction my life should take. The fisrt thing I did was to reflect on my life taking note of the things I was good at, my experiences because “…. you have to look back in order to understand the things that lie ahead” ~ Yvonne Woon.

As I look back, I realise that every time I thought I was being rejected from something good, I was actually being re-directed to something better and now I realise that was Heals (Help, Empowerment And Local Support). For the first time in my life I’m combining all the things I love and at the same time I’m helping to make changes for others too. I’ve realised that I’ve become successful in helping others change their lives and this has enriched my own life.

Colin Powell says “there are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work and learning from failure.” This is true, if you want to be successful you have to prepare, work hard and learn but most importantly, everything you do must be with passion. Sidney Greenburg says it perfectly “A successful man is one who lays a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him” and for me this has meant using my own life experiences (negative and positive) to help others.

My work at Heals is something I love, seeing the difference our work makes. Albert Schweitzer says “success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you’ll be a success.” If what Albert says is right then I am successful!

So when you come to a point in your life and you feel that you’ve lost your direction, look back and reflect, learn from the past, then plan for your future because “there is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life less than one you are capable of” and live the life you deserve!

http://www.heals.btck.co.uk

http://www.alisoncross-jones.com

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more then you are a leader ~ John Quincy Adams

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more then you are a leader.

“It is better to lead from behind and to put others in front, especially when you celebrate victory when nice things occur. You take the frontline when there is danger. Then people will appreciate your leadership.” ~ Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela is a man many today look to as an example of a great leader, in years to come generations will read his story in the history books and aspire to be like him. Like many other great leaders he’s left a lasting legacy.

In my many years of working in a range of industries I’ve come across managers with differing approaches. There have been those who’ve been dictatorial with no room for negotiation, discussion and neither did they allow creativity. They always sought to have the last word. There have been those who ‘managed‘ in name only! Although it said Manager on their badge, the staff pretty much did what they wanted to and chaos and disrution would follow or those less senior would have to step in and complete work that wasn’t their responsibility because the manager wasn’t doing their job! A few have been examples of excellent managers and leaders.

I remember the first manager I worked with around thirty years ago – Mrs Myers. Now here was a great manager! I was working in one of British Shoe Corporation’s shoe shops in Cardiff. Mrs Myers was approachable, firm when she had to be but she encouraged all her staff to be the best they could. I learnt so much from her. Many of her staff went on to lead successful lives either in manangement, business or other areas. I remember one instance when a new member of staff was struggling with reaching her sales target for that day. I had exceeded mine and Mrs Myers quietly asked me to give my next sales to this team member. She also added sales and that month everyone got a bonus! We all learnt that day that thinking of each other and working as a team helped everyone. In all my working life I haven’t forgotten Mrs Myers.

Is there a difference between management and leadership?

Peter Drucker ~ “Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right thing.”

Empowering your team is one of the greatest strengths of a leader and it’s the one thing so many get wrong or misjudge. “When the best leaders work is done the people say, we did it ourselves” ~ Lao Tzu

Over the years I’ve mentored a number of people and I’ve witnessed what they’ve achieved. Most have become and are still good friends and even today years later, we still talk about our early days of working together. Seeing them succeed in their lives is something words can’t describe.

Am I good leader? I try to be and I do try to follow the principles of good leadership. Sometimes I get it wrong but the lesson I’ve learnt is I’m human and human’s make mistakes! What we learn from those mistakes and how we try to ensure we don’t repeat those mistakes is what matter. Doing the right thing and thinking about the needs of each individual within your team is important because if your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more then you are a leader.

Your present situation is not your final destination because the best is yet to come!

Your present situation is not your final destination because the best is yet to come!

In fact we are the authors of our own life stories and just like any good ‘read’ our lives are filled with happy and sad events, times of laughter and times of struggle. For some the times of struggle are more than we can comprehend. I often think of people overcoming struggles as being like salmon swimming upstream. Are they going in the wrong direction or are they finding their own way.

I remember my Grandfather saying ” you’ve got to find your own way in life” and I used to think ‘what does he mean? I look back now and I realise that what he was really saying was, that I had to make choices that felt right. As it happens it’s sound advice but making choices about what felt right has also got me into trouble or not turned out the way I had hoped. I now use those negative experiences as stepping stones to something even better!

How many of us get pushed along dancing to someone else’s tune? This is different from guidance or advice because those offering you that do so out of a sense of care. Those pushing us along do so for their own reasons. This is why it’s important to have a firm plan and focus in business. In my experience being strategic is about three things:

1. Staying focused ~ know where your going, understand what the outcomes are but also recognise what they will actually look like. Too often we start in business and suddenly become vague about everything to do with that business. Are we vague in our personal lives? Of course not so why do it with our businesses? Be clear about what you are aiming to achieve, what you’re offering and how you are unique!

2. Seeing the bigger picture ~ this is more than being strategic focusing on the horizon, it’s about being able to see things from above. What makes our business different? Why should people choose us? What exactly are we offering? Strangely, I meet successful business people who seem unable to apply these principles to their personal lives?

3. Being able to assess the risk and manage success ~ this might seem odd but like anything in life, things unexpectedly happen! Things can go wrong, you can come up against an obstacle or things can become so successful, you’re swept along through success.

I’ve been on this very journey building HEALS (Help Empowerment And Local Support) and in my persoanl life too. There have been times I’ve doubted decisions, times when things have just seemed too far out of reach. There’ve also been other times when success has swept me along. It’s at these times I’ve had to apply the brakes, take a step back and reassess the direction. We should all do an assessment exercise in our business. I find it strange that people put together a business/strategic plan, write a governing document and then proceed to leave it on a shelf never to be looked at again. Then they wonder why it all goes/went wrong!

They’ve forgotten one important thing and that is their present situation is not their destination because their best is yet to come!

http://www.alisoncross-jones.com

http://www.heals.btck.co.uk

“Don’t carry your mistakes around with you. Instead, place them under your feet and use them as stepping stones. Never regret. If it’s good it’s wonderful, if it’s bad it’s experience.”

“Don’t carry your mistakes around with you. Instead, place them under your feet and use them as stepping stones. Never regret. If it’s good it’s wonderful, if it’s bad it’s experience.”

Over the years I’ve met a number of individuals who seem unable to move their lives forward because of their mistakes or something that went wrong or because something they had no control over has made them feel inadequate. The truth is it’s life, everyone faces these situations at sometime or other.

No-one is perfect and until we accept and learn to love ourselves for who we are, moving forward for some will remain an uphill struggle.

So how is it some people do and become successful? What sets those people apart is the ability to learn from every situation whether they be positive or negative.

There have been a number of times in my life when I’ve felt that was it, I couldn’t go on and I couldn’t see how I’d ever get back up but I did. I look at my life today and realise that I’m more resilient than I thought I was. I could have accepted the stereotypical ‘label’ placed on me by society – I was a single mother therefore, I wasn’t going to succeed and neither were my children. For many years this is what I expected and this is what I got! I now realise that whatever you strive for you can achieve but you have to be motivated, want it, see it and plan for it. You may not reach it the first time but you will achieve and you will be successful.

I am always amazed when I speak to successful people because the result isn’t always what they expected, in many cases it’s better! This is exactly how I feel! I knew I’d be doing the kind of work I do now but I didn’t think that starting and building a charity would be quite so exciting and rewarding.

Carrying your mistakes around with you weighs you down. I often liken it to Marley in the Dickens classic Scrooge. In death he carried around this huge chain, not being able to move forward. Carrying our mistakes is a bit like that too because we can end up carrying around our own invisable chain, which prevents us from being happy and it makes those around us unhappy too.

So, look at your own life and don’t carry your mistakes around with you. Instead, place them under your feet and use them as stepping stones. Never regret. If it’s good it’s wonderful, if it’s bad it’s experience.

http://www.alisoncross-jones.com

http://www.heals.btck.co.uk

The way to happiness!

Why is it that many of us go through life seeking the approval of others? Do we really need the approval of others to be happy? Of course we don’t! So why do it?

We all face heartache, disaster, life changes and losing loved ones, I know I’ve faced these too. At times I thought I’d never be able to go on but I got up and moved forward.

I’m often amazed at those who seek a partner who will ‘make them happy!’ Whenever I hear this I want to say, “expecting someone else to make you happy, is setting them up to fail” because happiness comes from within yourself. If you are content and happy, then you’ll attract others who are happy too.

We talk of finding happiness yet it’s there if we choose it. The way to happiness is to:

Believe in yourself – every one of us is unique, we all have things we’re good at and things we’re not so good at. There’ll be things we need to learn or improve. Being happy is understanding and learning to live and love who we are. Be confident in what you bring to the party of life!

Be kind to others – if you can do one act of kindness every day you’ll find that the happiness follows you. ‘Whatever you give out comes back to you twofold’ was the message my late Nan used to say and she was right. Making others happy gives a feeling of wellbeing that is so amazing, it can’t be put into words. This is why I’m Manager of HEALS!

Live by your values – set yourself values in your personal and professional lives. Don’t let others try to move or distract you from these values because if you live by these, you’ll be a shining example to others.

Reach for your dreams – remember that even those we consider as successful haven’t always been so. What sets them apart is the tenacity to get back up after each knockback. Newsflash! – everyone has knockbacks and challenges to face, so set yourself apart and face them head on!

Always think positively – every situation we face, be it our personal or professional life is a gift, even the low times! The challenge is finding and recognising this and that’s not easy to do. I’ve found myself facing challenges that I thought could never be solved but they were and I did! When this happens it helps us develop and it enriches our lives.

Keep your head high – the advert says ‘because you’re worth it’ and this is right. No-one has more worth than another! So no matter what keep your head high and show the world that you’re a winner and that you’re worth it too.

Being happy in life is essential for your own wellbeing both personally and professionally life – so start today to find the way to happiness.

http://www.alisoncross-jones.com

http://www.heals.btck.co.uk

“Where everybody matters…” but is this the impossible dream?

“Where everybody matters…” but is this the impossible dream? ‘Where everybody matters…’ is a strapline of a council – but is this the impossible dream? It shouldn’t be, caring about others and for others is what sets us apart as human beings.

Unfortunately, there are many people in our communities that are falling through the cracks, those who’s needs are not being met, where care in the community is failing them! It’s the twenty-first century, have we really moved so little in certain aspects of community life?

Care in the Community came about under the Thatcher Government. Was the aim to save money by closing down the institutions that cared for the vulnerable (young and older)? Was it to ‘enable’ people to be cared for at home and be a part of their community? The reality is the system has failed. Care companies can’t provide the levels of support that individuals need. Supported living funding is dwindling and unlike times gone by people are caught up in their own busy lives to really care or have the time to care about those in the community in need. Those in need may be living in the community but they are isolated and lonely.

The idea of community today seems to some to be talking about great initiatives that go no further than the talk. Some ideas halt either because of a lack of interest or due to in-fighting between the community ‘big fish!’.

Gone are the days when everyone in the community would ‘muck in’ and look out for one another. Technology has made great advancements while community appears to be doing a ‘moonwalk!’ facing forward but walking backwards.

One example of how care has failed is Tom. Is it right that an individual under fifty five with a brain injury is given a tenancy when they struggle to live everyday doing basic tasks? Is it right that this same person is supported for just two hours in the morning by workers from a care agency (contracted by the council) and one hour every night – leaving them alone for twenty one hours! Is it right that no-one in the community cares enough to support this individual? Is it right that this person is on the receiving end of verbal abuse by some in the community (including children)? Is it right for the care agency to respond with verbal aggression to acts of kindness and care towards this individual? How can this all be okay? Of course it isn’t but this is a description of just one of many the cases that charities like HEALS (Help Encouragement And Local Support) see increasingly and alarmingly!

Who is wrong? The Government for the Care in the Community Policy in the first place and then reducing funding? Perhaps it’s the care agency who’ve got the local council’s care contract for not giving enough care and support? Could it be the council’s Social Service Department for not putting in place the right care package? Is it the housing policy of the council and local housing providers for this person not being eligible for supported housing due to the fact they are below fifty five? Is it the community for not offering support? The reality is it’s all of the above – this is where partnership, social and moral responsibility for one another and a true sense of care for one another and community will and can change lives!

Today, no-one should be left alone and everyone deserves to live the life they deserve to live. No-one should believe that death is a better propect than living!

Care in the Community – without care or community is an impossible dream!

It’s not an impossible dream, HEALS wants to make this a reality one day, it can happen, if we believe, if we care, if we work in partnership and collaboration, everybody will really matter!

HEALS believes that “you never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obselete” – Buckminster Fuller. We’re planning to build a network of help, encouragement and local support across the UK. You can be a part of this too – start 2014 by doing something amazing ~ form a local Heals charity. Together we can give hope to those in need and those who fall through the gaps and who the system fails. This what community is all about and what HEALS aims to achieve.

“Where everybody matters …..” is not the impossible dream, it can be a reality.

http://www.alisoncross-jones.com

http://www.heals.btck.co.uk

“The goal is not to have a great picture; the goal is to love the picture you have.” ~ Betsy Otter Thompson

The New Year came with hope for a better times and with joyus celebrations around the world. At least that’s the picture potrayed. The reality is somewhat different, there will be people facing fears, others may be looking at life changing decisions and others will face the year ahead not knowing or understanding the direction they should take. Perhaps this year we should look around us and reach out to those who are going to find things difficult because will help them in their time of need and giv us a reality check.

‘Some people are so lucky’ is a phrase I often hear but is this really true? Is life down to just luck and destiny? I believe we all have a destiny, a path in life that suits us as individuals. However, I also think that our choices and decisions also play a key part in influencing what we have and where we go.

The other focus in the New Year for everyone is health. Have you noticed the increased adverts about weight loss and keep fit? How many of us set resolutions to be thinner, healthier, run a marathon and by March or even February have given up? How many of us look at the ‘health’ of our business or charity? It’s important that we do, because a healthy organisation flourishes. I’ve witnessed businesses, charities and organisations clinging on by their fingertips rather than accept there are issues and try to address them.

Have we considered that our own health and that of our business or charity is linked? If you are unwell, unhappy, unfocused, have lost your drive or are lost, then it’s likely that your business or charity will be affected. So we need to be happy and fulfilled in what we do, otherwise what is the point?

We all need those who we can turn to in our ‘hour’ of need, those who can offer advice, help, encouragement and support. There’s lots of this out there if we look. Over the last few years ‘ve come across a number of business networks, groups and organisations and charities. The one that has helped me personally and professionally is I Am Woman ~ it’s a business club for women with a difference.

HEALSUK is striving to be a focal point of support for local HEALS charities and they in turn offer, help, encouragement and support to those in need who are willing to help themselves.

Those of us in businesses/charities look at the year ahead and will have already spent much of the latter part of 2013 being visionary about what should be achieved in 2014. Those who’ve set goals are more likely to succeed than those who leave it to luck.

Whatever we do in life, we should set out and aim to do it the best way we can and to be the best we can. It isn’t just about shouting “look at me and what I do”, it’s about being SMART about the goals we set and setting goals is about much more than just writing down targets. It’s about sticking to our values too. Do your personal and professional values aline with those in your business/charity? If not why not? Why accept things and standards in our worklife that we wouldn’t in our private life?

Some people seem to find goal setting difficult. I know for me, setting personal goals is much more difficult than setting goals for my business/charity but my personal and professional values are alined which is good news. Other people get caught up and focused on needing to be accepted and they slip into changing their values, their business model and objectives just to ‘fit in’ . Will they succeed – it’s unlikely!

Be SMART (Specific ~ Measurable ~ Attainable ~ Realistic and Timely) with your goals and set them so that the tasks to achieve them, require you to put in work because “the goal is not to have a great picture; the goal is to love the picture you have.”

http://www.heals.btck.co.uk

http://www.alisoncross-jones.com

http://www.iamwoman.biz

Welcome to the New Year 2014 – “If you can dream it you can do it” ~ Walt Disney

It’s a new year and it’s an opportunity to start anew and put the past behind us. For one day the world is united in hope, joy and celebration.

We begin an unwritten chapter in our lives. We set goals, (New Year resolutions). These are our the hopes and desires, we believe will help us progress towards better, brighter and happier times. So what better time is there to launch big plans and make lifestyle changes.

Only we can choose and steer our own path, it’s not down to others. How will we use this opportunity? It’s the time we think about what we’d like to change instead of waiting for someone else to do it or change it for us.

Of course we all make and change plans throughout the year about our personal, family, professional and business lives but there is something ‘magical’about the New Year.

Every New Year is a time of Transformation and we must take the gift of the lessons of the past and strive for our goals.

HEALS (Help Empowerment And Local Support) is going to use this is a key time to impliment the plans laid down in 2013. It’s the year we work together and take what started as a small local charity, onto the national scene! Where we build for the future, where we aim high and a year when lives and communities across the UK are changed.

2014 is going to be a year of transformation for me too and it’s a time of reflection. I look back at how far I’ve come and I reach for the incredible journey ahead. I see the challenges and I’m ready to face them, are you?

Ask yourself “What can I achieve in this new year?” “What goals can I set?” and you’ll be directed to your dreams. 2014 can be your year, where everything is possible because “if you dream it, you can do it”.

HAPPY NEW YEAR ~ MAKE IT HAPPEN ~ BELIEVE IN YOURSELF ~ FOCUS ~ AND LIVE THE LIFE YOU WANT AND YOU DESERVE WITHOUT FEAR ~ REMEMBER YOU ARE UNIQUE

http://www.heals.btck.co.uk

http://www.alisoncross-jones.com

When you dance to your own rhythm …..

We all have our own path to follow in life. For some the path to be taken is obvious from an early age, for others it comes via their career path and through job opportunities. Some people ‘like me’ take a while longer to work out where they need to be. No matter how we come to realise our chosen path, it takes courage to be successful because successful people recognise their own strengths, gifts and abilities as well as weaknesses, opportunities challenges to overcome.

Attitude is a key factor in achieving our own goal in life. If you think you’ll fail, you probably will, those who believe in who they are and what they do, will succeed eventually. Maybe not the first time and it may take many more times of trying but they’ll believe in themselves and strive for success.

My work within social housing and adult education, together with my voluntary work has been a solid foundation for me finding my personal and professional path. In turn this has helped me lead and take HEALS (Help Empowerment And Local Support) over the last two and a half years to the next level. It’s meant facing all kinds of personal and professional challenges, all of which have tested my belief in the organisation, my personal resilience and has at times meant rethinking the goals. However, giving up has never been an option because what HEALS does and the effect and impact it has on people’s lives, is far too important

HEALS started as an idea and from a recognised missing need. Over time, through events, talking and listening to those who come to us for help, encouragement and support and through our developing and increasing partnerships, we’ve developed projects that are unique and innovative.

It’s not been all plain sailing, nothing ever is, there have been those who for their own reasons have not supported or seen the benefits of what HEALS does and at the start I used to find this difficult to cope with but not anymore.

As we approach a New Year, we each have the chance to write a new chapter; the future is what we choose to write. We can begin positively or in doubt, it’s our choice. I’ll be starting 2014 on a positive note and attitude. Who knows where it will lead? One thing’s for sure it can only lead to success for everyone but most importantly for those who are helped, encouraged and supported.

I now realise that when people become negative about something that delivers positive results, it says much more about their attitude and self belief because “When you dance to your own rhythm, people may not understand you; they may even hate you but mostly they’ll wish they had the courage to do the same!”

Christmas reflections ~ personal and professional

At Christmas we spend time with our family and friends. We share our time and speak to those we love. We look back on the year and reflect. We think about those who are no longer with us and reflect on the legacy they’ve left behind.

We welcome those who’ve joined our families through relationships, birth and/or adoption. We wonder what life holds for them in the future.

Those in business and charities might contemplate the achievements and the lessons learnt from the things that didn’t quite go to plan – there’ll always be one, two or even more!

This year has been one of those for me and HEALS (Help Encouragement And Local Support). There’s been huge ‘highs’ for me this has been my national award and Pride of Britain nomination. There have been times when I’ve had to pinch myself just to make sure that it was real. Who would ever have thought that it would happen to someone like me!

For HEALS it’s been the knowledge that the work we’ve done has literally helped lives. There have also been lessons to learn but these will make us stronger as an organisation for the future.

As I look back I’m left wondering why people and organisations fail. I’ve seen people start ventures be it businesses, community organisations, projects and along the way these have stopped, stalled, failed or just cease to exist, why? From what I’ve seen and observed there appears to be five key things. Either the individuals or organisations:

Have a negative attitude or ‘big fish small pond syndrome’ – they know what they want to achieve but they think they can do it all and it becomes all about them and any advice is perceived as negative
Are not being able to navigate through problems and issues – sometimes when things are going through a ‘rough’ patch they lack the courage or self-belief to deal with it and give up
Feel they are victims and refuse to take responsibility –holding your hands up to mistakes takes courage, being successful in business takes courage
Never make a plan or taking a strategic view – everything needs a plan but plans need to be flexible to take account of changes and possible risks
See collaboration as a threat – collaboration is the key to success, why ‘reinvent the wheel’

So how is it people and organisations succeed? Successful people and organisations set themselves apart from those who fail because they:

Are not afraid to ask for and listen to advice
Invest in something they know something about and seek expert help when needed
Think strategically, see the wider picture, focus on what needs to be done and write a plan
Have a positive attitude and never give up – they adapt
Think through challenges and issues and are able to find solutions
Are not afraid to admit when they are wrong and look for the lessons they can learn from every situation

As we all reflect on the year behind us and the journey, we have to ask ourselves are we successful? For me personally and for HEALS, if my observations of success is correct then I know we’re both on the right track for success.

I’m going to spend Christmas with those I love and care about in the knowledge that the future looks bright both personally and professionally.